Hello shopkeeper. I’d like to buy this 18 game
It will be great to enjoy after my hard job at the end of the day
I’ve just been at the pub to volunteer
Do you like my new Rosie and Jim tattoo I’ve had for years?
I don’t need ID,
I know the code,
453470
My Legoland driving license will have to do,
I should have words with my lawyer about you
Take a look outside your see my car over there in the distance very, very far
My Dad’s with me but he has a growing disease
and looks like he is in his teens
If you want shopkeepermate we can take this outside!
Just bring the game in a bag to hide
What if I was to tell you I’ve got 6 months to live?
That’s not even enough time to get past the tutorial bit
Please let me buy it – I’ll be your best friend
Cross my heart and hope to die till the bitter end
Looks like I’ll have to take my business elsewhere,
I was going to invite you to my birthday party
But sorry life’s not fair
I’ll just go to a shop up the street
Get some fags and booze instead
Where I don’t need ID